...an old woman, filled with regret, waiting to die alone...

I'm still here. Suffering. Not much more to say. My miserable life is an everyday constant uphill battle. It seems and feels like I've lived forever already. 

I wish I was better at this thing called life. I wish I knew what to do next, where to turn to. I feel stuck. In misery. I guess misery loves company.

Every once in a while, it seems like I'm trying. Trying something new, trying to live. Allthought, nothing feels like anything anymore. And even though how hard I try or how many times, nothing seems to change.

So it's like I've become something I always dredded.